Littlest Angels grief support offers advice

Tuesday, June 1, 2004

In collaboration with Child’s Month in the Cayman Islands, Littlest Angels Grief Support Group has launched a brochure to increase awareness of parental rights when a baby dies before and after 24 weeks of pregnancy, says an Executive member of the support group, Priscilla Powery.

The aim of the Littlest Angels Grief Support Group, in association with the Our Angel Foundation, is to provide newly-bereaved parents with opportunities for them to share their feelings about their loss and to aid them in the positive resolution of their grief.

Every child’s life is precious and the hopes and dreams for a child are filled with anticipation and joy.

When death comes those dreams are shattered and the parents’ world is shaken. This is an extremely difficult situation because most people never expect a child to die and after the initial grief they do not know how to interact with the grieving parent.

Where the loss is that of a baby through miscarriage, ectopic pregnancy, stillbirth, or early infant death, it seems that society expects the parents to quickly “get over it and move on with life.”

However, the mother and father experiencing this loss need as much pampering, concern, affection and attention to their needs as parents whose baby has survived.

The mother needs to be assured that this is something that has happened to her and that she is not in any way to blame.

She needs to be encouraged to take good care of herself and to restore balance in her life.

Fathers grieve differently but they need the same encouragement and support.

Family and friends need to make an effort not to under-estimate the depth of the pain, the length of the grief, and most importantly, the difference support and involvement can make during this painful adjustment.

As the moment of loss is usually shared with hospital staff, it is important that the medical personnel respond positively to the special needs of the bereaved parents.

Parents may expect to be given the opportunity to see, hold and touch their baby and bond with him or her, even in death.

Photographs of the baby may be taken and other mementos collected, such as the crib card, ultrasound photos, lock of hair, imprints of the hands and feet and record of weight and length.

The baby may be named and a farewell ritual planned. Information should be presented in terminology understandable to the parents regarding their baby’s status and cause of death, if determinable, including the autopsy and pathology reports and medical records.

Parents will also be made aware of support resources, which will assist them in the healing process, such as reading materials and the Littlest Angels Grief Support Group.

The current contact people for the Littlest Angels Grief Support group are Annie-Mae Roffey (916-0132), Priscilla Powery (927-4213), Julene Banks (949-3458/917-6829) and Cyndy Ebanks 947-4382.

For more information on Our Angel Foundation, contact Heather McVicar on 926-7745.

Reader comments:

• Thanks for including our article in your paper - Priscilla

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