EDITORIAL
Violence Is Violence No Matter What You Call It
Tuesday, August 24, 2004
Domestic violence is a crime. The use of the word domestic does not negate
the word violence.
When a man hits a woman, just because he does it in a domestic situation,
does not mean it is somehow less serious. The problems and often-tragic
consequences of domestic violence have been all too visible recently.
The murder of a 28-year-old Jamaican women last Wednesday in West Bay was
no less of a murder because it occurred as a result of a domestic dispute.
Day after day, the women at the Crisis Centre here on Grand Cayman deal
with the results of domestic violence and abuse.
Most of the women that find their way to the Centre’s doors have often
endured years of violence and abuse at the hands of husbands and boyfriends.
They may have attempted to leave their partners countless times before they
finally manage to make it to a place of safety, but even then they may still
end up back in an abusive situation
This is not because these women are weak or stupid; it is because there are
often few alternatives.
When women leave an abusive partner, they have to find somewhere new to
live, a job and someone to take care of their children. They need emotional
support and help to rebuild their lives.
That can sometimes be impossible and in many cases abused women feel they
have no option but to return to the environment from which they fled.
Without serious support for these women who leave violent men, they will
continue to return to abusive situations, or others may never leave at all. As
a result there could be more women like last week’s victim in West Bay.
Nor is the support needed just a matter of money. It is about education,
awareness and above all, addressing cultural behaviour.
Domestic abuse, sexual abuse and the abuse of women in general is still not
discussed anywhere near as much as it should be in our society. Women often
feel ashamed about sexual assaults and fail to report them because they
believe they will be blamed.
Women remain silent about the abuse they suffer in the home because their
mothers, aunts and grandmothers remained silent and accepted abuse as part of
life. Many are often embarrassed to allow others to know about their plight.
There is an underlying cultural prevalence that seems to condone the idea
that domestic violence is not the same as regular violence and that matters
between a man and a woman who are married or in a committed relationship are
only between them.
But a punch or a kick from a husband or partner is no less horrific than
one from a stranger.
It may be a cultural particularism not uncommon to the region, but cultural
particularisms should never be justifications for violence.
Men should not hit or abuse women, full stop. Even in a patriarchal
society, the law should still protect women from abuse and more importantly
government should be helping to ensure that all men are aware of this.
From as early an age as possible, society has a duty to teach boys to
respect girls. It is essential that schools address the issues of violence
with even the youngest children. Girls in particular should be encouraged to
assert themselves and not accept the idea that sometimes their boyfriends will
hit them.
Boys who have seen their fathers hit their mothers should be helped to
understand that it is wrong.
For too long the abuse of women has remained hidden behind the word
domestic. It is time that everyone began talking about what this really is -
violence against women – and begin the process of stopping it.
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