There is more to wedding invitations than listing who is marrying.  First we must know how formal the wedding will be, what information, besides the obvious, we want to include, and who will be the host.

This will determine the formality of the invitations itself.

Determining what information should be listed and creating the perfect invitation is not an easy task.

Plus, there are some etiquette rules to follow, such as not including gift registry information.  Let's read what others are asking.

Question: When sending invitations for a wedding, are you or are you not supposed to put the gift registry card in the invite?

My Reply: Gifts are never mentioned in a wedding invitation, even if store personnel states that it is appropriate.

Question: We are getting married out of state and cannot transport wedding gifts. How do we let our guests know not to bring gifts with them to our wedding? Do we include a note in the invitations, if so how would we state that?

My Reply: It is unfortunate more people do not know that they are supposed to ship the gifts to the home of the couple or bride before the wedding, because no mention of gifts is to be included in the invitation.  So, if you have a wedding website you could mention this here.  Or, you will have to rely on 'word of mouth'.

If you receive gifts, you will have to ship them home.

Question: We will be getting married in Las Vegas.  We want to send out invitations or something to that effect, to a select small group of people, as they have indicated that hey would like to come.  This is only for a wedding (no reception).  How do you word this sort of invitation?  Keep in mind that if anyone should want to come that they would have to pay for themselves.

My Reply: This could be as formal or informal as you wish.  You could verbally invite them as well.

But, a standard wedding invitation is fine.  Just list Vegas as the location.  Include information (on separate paper) about accommodations as an enclosure.

If you are inviting them, it would only be polite to offer them something such as a dinner or welcome cocktail.  It isn't polite to invite others and not offer them something.  Also, if all of you do go out for dinner, it would be assumed that you would pay because this is the polite thing to do.  So, please keep this in mind when inviting.

Question: I have friends marrying soon and they have done something that I have never seen and it has upset the groom's parents tremendously. On their wedding invitations, they have asked the guests to bring a dish to pass. Isn't this a definite no-no? They are paying for a DJ and the groom's mother feels that if they can do that, then they can afford to feed their guests. I think this is causing some very bad feelings and I was hoping you could give me some advice.

My Reply: This is unfortunate.  Nothing like this should ever be printed on an invitation.  Plus... Yikes!

Asking for food from your guests?  This is in very poor taste.  There is a very simple rule for all entertaining: you invite, you pay.  We only host the party we can afford to host.  Hopefully they didn't mention their registry or gift preferences on these as well.

It is best for the mothers not to become involved.  It really is none of her business, even if she is contributing.  The damage has been done and these comments cannot prevent them from making this mistake.  At this point she would only seem judgmental.  It is unfortunate the children didn't ask anyone for advice or at least read about proper etiquette before planning this.  They just may be embarrassed when they hear what others think.

I was informed later that, indeed, the couple included their gift registry information in their invitations.  Very unfortunate.